Fell off the horse
You know I just have a lot of random thoughts. And really they are all about the same thing.
As this whole sorry situation plays out I find myself realising that if I only took the chance when it was there, not when it suited me, maybe I wouldn't be stuck.
So while I thought I had so many options and could pick and choose, said options weren't real keen on waiting for me. And because I'm so selfish and stupid I kept trying for something I could never achieve.. and when I realised, I crashed. Hard. And then over and over again with my backup plans.
And it is partly because of my own incompetance and partly because we all misjudged the situation and while these options may be right for me I may not be right for them. Finally I wonder, is it something I did, or am I just not good enough?